After a week of grey sky, heavy clouds, and a return of the freezing cold, the sun is finally out again this morning. Usually, at the sight of a blue sky announcing itself at dawn, when I drive to work, would make me feel the urge to go out for a run. I would feel that “yay, this is going to be a good day.”
But then, this morning, nothing like that happened. The grey mood had stayed for an entire week now, and the mere thought of putting on running clothes makes me pull my head back into the largest and warmest scarf I could find this morning.
I’m not someone to usually complain about the weather, about the cold, about the workload or the complexity of projects, but then there are those days… when it is all just too much. When it has been too much for too long. When getting up in the morning is torture and you find yourself seriously wondering whether you’re too old to call in sick when you aren’t. Being 35 myself, that is, of course (unfortunately) not an option. I never pretended to be sick as a child to skip school but this morning, and the ones before… well, I was very close to it.
Nothing in the daily stressful routine is inspiring or motivating anymore. The big question might very soon, some day, impose itself on me, sooner than I thought, as to whether it might be time to move on. Another job. Another routine, that won’t fill me with dread and make me have nightmares, headaches, cramps in my chest and all that goes with it. It’s not like there are any options out there, but it might however be time to keep the eyes open for new opportunities…